I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
