4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
