woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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