well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Randomize
