On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
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