I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
