I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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