he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
