The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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