the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize