hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
