K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Randomize
