i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I still have a little drunk in my system
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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