Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
