I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I'm both gender and math confused
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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