So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
