Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
Randomize