somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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