How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Randomize
