I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Randomize
