You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize
