we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Randomize
