yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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