Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize