The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
