I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Randomize
