Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
