I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
