I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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