Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
