STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
The power of my boobs compel you
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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