Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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