I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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