Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I think I am morally bankrupt
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
The struggles of a small town man whore
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize