How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
