yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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