Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
