he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize