good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
