Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
