Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize