i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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