Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
