Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
