Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
