yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
