I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
