All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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