Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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