i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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