you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
i drank out of a bidet.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
