i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
