so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
